The Clearing

I've been home sweet home for five days now and it feels so good. By the time I left the hospital last Thursday night my itching had increased and I was definitely reacting to the 3rd med so the stipulation for coming home was that I had to take Benadryl around the clock, which left me groggy on top of tired. Fortunately for me, as my body's adjusted to the medication the itching has decreased and I was able to wean off of the Benadryl by Sunday. Score!

As the fog lifted I began to feel clarity. And with that clarity came an overwhelming sense of gratitude. I'm grateful that the meds have me moving in the right direction...grateful for each ounce of strength I get back...grateful that I'm using my 'rescue' inhalers less...and grateful for all of the love and support that surrounds me. Not to beat a dead horse, but I truly am deeply grateful for all of the amazing people in my world--they're pretty effing awesome! 

When I was in the hospital I was feeling pretty numb emotionally; I was just going through the motions, doing what I had to do in order to get better. Maybe it was a coping mechanism, maybe it was because I was running on empty, or maybe it was a combination of the two. But as I've gotten a little energy back my heart is swelling full of love and gratitude.

Warning: I'm about to get a little cheesy...  

When I posted about going into the hospital I posted a meme about finding rainbows when it rains and I feel like in this particular storm I've found one. The love and kindness that's been bestowed upon me has literally moved me to tears and reminded me why my passion is connecting with others. It's not always easy to let others help when the going gets tough--and I'm still not 100% comfortable with it--but just the fact that support is out there and that people care is one of life's greatest gifts. I am richer than rich where it truly matters and grateful beyond words. 

While I don't wish life's storms on anyone, unfortunately they are inevitable and a part of the human experience. What I do wish is that when your storm hits you can let your guard down enough to find a little help from your friends. It's not always easy, but it is truly beautiful.